Ben Duckett asked sarcastically how much of the last hour Ravindra Jadeja, 89 not out, and Washington Sundar, on 80, would need for their centuries. Zak Crawley, cutting right to the chase, called it "embarrassing".
It turns out all they needed was about 15 minutes. Ben Stokes, eventually, had his offer to shake hands on his first non-rain-affected draw accepted. And, though those 15 minutes made this formality much colder, neither Jadeja nor Washington cared. Likewise, the crowd, now predominantly Indian, who had stuck around for the cherry on top of this impressively composed rearguard from their heroes.
Another time, England will have seen such joyous scenes from their opponents as a reflection of their superiority. It was on this ground 20 years ago that a great Australia team lauded it up on the away balcony after escaping nine down to keep the Ashes series at 1-1. "Look, the mighty Aussies are celebrating a draw with England - we've got them now…" Michael Vaughan had told his players then.
India cannot win this series now, but Shubman Gill could offer a similar view of the sour attitude displayed by England in the dregs of day five. They fought hard and ended up rattling an opponent that had hitherto dominated this Test match. As understandably frustrated the hosts were at being kept on the field for - eventually - 143 overs, India may well view the frayed tempers, which exacerbate the tired bodies, as an extra advantage going into the final Test. Getting out of the series with a 2-2 scoreline would make this a successful tour.
If England were irked by Jadeja's milestone-hunting, they could have just dismissed him first ball. Jofra Archer got one to lift and take the left-hand batter's edge, but Joe Root missed two attempts to claim it at first slip.
Archer was flying, having removed Gill for 103, though even that took three attempts. Saturday's drop by Liam Dawson at gully (with Gill on 46) was followed on Sunday by Ollie Pope (with Gill on 81) at cover.
It is pretty obvious England's anger at how the match concluded was not squarely on two players bagging deserved hundreds. Though they arrived on Sunday morning still with eight wickets to get after two wicketless sessions the day before, and just 137 of their 311 first-innings lead intact, confidence was high.
The rough outside the off stump of the left-hand batters - India with three to come when Gill and KL Rahul resumed - and the uncertain bounce, particularly for those bowling from the James Anderson End, filled them with hope. And yet, even with the two drops, they only created five chances in the final 80 overs, 63 of which came with the second new ball.
For once, the Dukes balls played ball. Neither side had it changed over the course of the five days. That Crawley was warned by the umpires for throwing the ball short of wicketkeeper Jamie Smith to scuff a surface for some reverse swing showed the ball remained hard throughout.
"It's been a series so far of hard toil, in particular the bowling units from both sides," Stokes said at the end, himself having been afflicted with calf, left hamstring and right bicep tendon issues in this match alone, even if they have been compounded by the 140 overs in his body since the start of the series.
"You've really had to work really, really hard for your rewards. We're not going to hide away from the fact that it's been a very tough four games so far for the guys who have played, in particular the bowling unit."
Pitches like these, even if they have been tailored to England's needs to an extent, are why they have assembled a battery of quicks who are either tall enough to hit the deck hard enough to extract what life there is, or fast enough to cause discomfort.
Injuries have dwindled those resources, meaning rotation across the four Tests has been non-existent. Archer replacing Josh Tongue from the third Test onwards has been the only change to a pace attack running on fumes.
Gus Atkinson would have likely come in for Chris Woakes in Manchester had he been deemed fit enough. Though he was unable to get into Surrey's first team this week, he will come into contention for the fifth Test. Jamie Overton, who did play for Surrey against Yorkshire (albeit only bowling in the first innings, with 0 for 81 from 14 overs) will join him when the squad meets up in London.
Mark Wood had initially earmarked the final match for a return from knee surgery, but has been held back. And though Stokes says he will give the current attack - including himself - as much time as possible to recover ahead of Thursday's start at the Kia Oval, a refresh of the pack is overdue.
Gautam Gambhir says Jadeja and Washington deserved to reach their landmarks after battling it out on day five
Meanwhile, Dawson's return to Test cricket put a new slant on England's spin position. An eight-year hiatus brought just one wicket in the first innings but all the control you would expect from a 35-year-old left-arm spinner who has been the cream of the domestic crop.
His economy rate of 2.02 across a mammoth 47 overs in India's second innings was double-edged. Reliable but for no reward.
On the one hand, his metronomic bustle was integral to how Stokes managed his tired quicks; able to shuffle through them to utilise the up-and-down on offer while Dawson had the Brian Statham End locked down.
A switch of ends allowed Archer to prise out Gill, and the pair shared nine overs after lunch that brought little other than a few nicks for Dawson. Had Root held Jadeja, it could have been a more fruitful union.
Dawson seemed particularly forthright with Stokes, the pair discussing tactics at great length on either side of the tea interval. They departed having analysed the rough, leading to Dawson operating around the wicket to the left-hand batters after the break with a 7-2 leg-side field. That was abandoned after two swiped Jadeja boundaries in five deliveries.
Steve Harmison on the spinner's failure to impact proceedings
"You have discussions with all your bowlers around what we can look at doing differently," Stokes said of their animated conversation. "What do you think is the most threatening? Can we look at doing this differently?
"We tried quite a few different plans, set a few different fields to make the Indian batters feel a bit uncomfortable."
Stokes does enjoy that back and forth with his bowlers. And the pair shared a nice moment when Dawson's competitive edge meant he wanted to keep going at Jadeja and Washington in the hope of ending their century quests. Stokes offered a consolatory hug to let him know his work was done. There will be more to do this week.
Could Dawson have done more here? Perhaps he should have varied his position on the crease and, say, gone wider to the left-hand batters to offer more of a pronounced challenge of either edges. Maybe more variations of pace?
England do believe Dawson has been unlucky, eliciting 31 false shots in the second innings without reward. And yet, a solid but unspectacular return has you wondering how Shoaib Bashir might have gone here.
India would have probably knocked off the deficit sooner had the offspinner been playing. But the raw Bashir, with his unpredictability - and higher release point - might have sparked something.
There is a reason England did not go back to Jack Leach when Bashir broke his finger at Lord's. It is the same reason they plumped for Bashir at the start of the 2024 summer over the man who is forcing him to leave Somerset. In Dawson, they see the variety of a banker who is a talented allrounder. But here, they would have liked Bashir's big-revs, big rip, big dip from a great height.
Sunday, for all the ill-feeling, did at least vindicate the decisions the England management have made to grow and fine-tune their approach. But it is a vindication that, right now, will not nourish them all that much.
As the team sipped beers in the home dressing room on Sunday evening, they would have toasted their hard work. Another cheers to Root ascending to second on the Test run charts. A further one to Stokes marrying a first five-wicket haul in eight years with a first century in two.
But for all the history and glory achieved, they will want to forget about this day as quickly as possible.