If Linden King decides to get out of his chair to walk across the room, he first feels pain in his left ankle. As he shifts his weight to the right, pain shoots from his right knee and hip. A few steps more, and the arches in both feet ache to the point when he can't walk anymore.
Worse than any of that, though, is that by the time King reaches his destination, he forgets why he went there in the first place.
King was an NFL linebacker for 13 seasons, from 1978 to 1989 (he spent his rookie year on injured reserve). He blames professional football for ailments that now limit his activities and social life, leaving him with feelings of loss and loneliness.
King, 70, is far from alone.
According to the ESPN/KFF Survey of 1988 NFL Players, almost every respondent -- 96% -- reported having pain in the past three months. Half reported they experience pain every day, compared to 23% of men their age. In many cases, chronic pain limits the players' work or social lives. They also reported rates of cognitive decline three times higher than that of men their age, with 55% saying they had confusion or memory loss that's happening more often or getting worse.
The survey interviewed 546 players -- more than one-third of those living today -- about their total life outcomes as they near retirement age, from their physical and mental health to their attitudes about the game today. Players, whose average age is 62, reported experiencing physical and mental decline at rates several times more severe than men their age across a range of categories.
Some of the findings related to physical and mental health include:
Forty-seven percent of former players said they had serious difficulty concentrating, remembering or making decisions, compared to 6% of men their age. (Comparisons to men of a similar age are based on data from large federal health surveys or other KFF surveys.)
The players were twice as likely to report having pain that limited their daily life or work activities most days (35% versus 13%). For a simple task such as walking or climbing stairs, 36% of the ex-NFL players reported having difficulty, more than three times men their age. Nearly one in five reported difficulty dressing or bathing.
About half of players reported feeling depressed in the past 12 months, compared to a quarter of men their age.
Fifteen percent of players reported being diagnosed with dementia. According to one study based on the National Health Interview Survey, just under 4% of men ages 65 and older have been diagnosed with dementia.
King, who responded to the survey, was drafted from Colorado State in 1977. He played with the San Diego Chargers and the Los Angeles Raiders.
A newspaper in Escondido, Calif., featured King on the front of its sport section in August 1985, previewing the Chargers season and noting he had started 55 of the team's 57 games since 1981. The story describes the 6-foot-5, 250-pound linebacker as having a large cut over his nose and an arm that appeared to have "14 different shades of black and blue."
"Maybe all my years of getting beat up will pay off," King said in the Daily Times-Advocate story. "Look at me -- and this is only the preseason."
When King was 34 and nearing the end of his time in the league, he had a physical with an NFL doctor in San Diego.
"He said, 'When you get to 65, you're going to be a mess,' because everything was degenerating," King said. "And I say, 'Oh, yeah, come on, doctor.'"
After he retired in 1990, King pursued weightlifting. He was ripped, a real "Junior Arnold," he said -- a reference to actor, governor and onetime body builder Arnold Schwarzenegger. King thought his aches and pains were no big deal.
But by age 60 -- five years before the doctor predicted -- King had both knees replaced. He later replaced both of his hips, and shoulders, too.
According to the ESPN/KFF survey, two-thirds of ex-NFL players surveyed have had orthopedic surgery on their knees -- the most common body part on which players had procedures -- with nearly one in five having had a knee replacement. A little more than one-third have had shoulder surgery. And two-thirds of players said they've been diagnosed with arthritis, gout, lupus or fibromyalgia, compared with 38% of men their age.
And one-third of players said they had pain that limited their life or work activities in the past three months. In anonymous responses to open-ended questions in the survey, many players also said they've needed to give up golf and other recreational activities because of the pain they experience.
King said he gave up racquetball and turns down his friends' requests to go golfing. "If I hadn't played football, I'd be playing golf every day," King said.
David Grayson, 61, a former linebacker for the San Diego Chargers and Cleveland Browns, also said he has declined activities with friends due to pain in his back and hands. In an interview with ESPN, Grayson said he feels pain "24/7."
"The whole battle is to stay upright and keep going," said Grayson, who also participated in the ESPN/KFF survey. "My head hurts, my neck hurts, my back hurts, my fingers hurt."
Three in 10 players reported that, since retiring from the game, they at some point were unable to work because of a disability brought on by a football-related injury. Of those, nearly half said they were unable to work for five years or more. In open-ended responses, many players pointed to more serious limitations due to pain, such as the difficulty or inability to walk, sleep, put on shoes or do chores.
"In my current condition, you can't tie your shoes or button your shirts, simple things like that," one player said.
"I sometimes get embarrassed when I walk because I limp and labor to walk," another said.
"Arthritis in both my hands; can't hold or grip anything," one said. "Have constant tingling in my hands and feet. My hands shake and burn constantly."
One simply said, "Unable to perform basic skills around the house."
About one-third of players said they have given up at least some daily activities or chores because of memory loss or confusion.
For King, signs of cognitive decline started in his mid-40s, he said.
He cited a moment from when he was around 45 and moving some items out of storage during his divorce. He gathered up family Christmas decorations, some of his children's mementos and even a pair of boots he had since his childhood and took them to the dump.
"And that alerted me that you're not the same guy, because I've always been very sentimental about stuff like that," he said, his voice breaking while recounting the story. "I just threw it out, and now I'd give anything to get it back."
He now lives with his three dogs in Las Vegas in a modest, if disorganized, $1,500-a-month home.
"My brain, the part of my brain that has to do with the daily regulation of pots and pans, and dishes and chores and responsibility, is gone" he said.
He is asked, how many children does he have? Two, he answered. Any grandchildren?
"No, uh, no grandchildren," he said, then a pause. "Oh, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Damn. Yeah, I do. I have an 8-year-old grandson.
"See, this is what I'm talking about. I should have known that. The only reason I remember it is because fortunately he's a great little baseball player. I don't have to worry about him playing football."
King now trains dogs for a living. The job doesn't pay much, but he said it's the only one he can handle with his memory and focus issues.
Grayson said he's aware he might face cognitive decline. He said he watched his father, who played professional football for 10 seasons, suffer with brain impairment before he died in 2017.
"It's scary. You know, I think about it every single day," he said, adding that he tries "to plan and deal with it the best way possible."
Still, Grayson said he wouldn't change his experience playing football, that it was the "best time in my life."
King, on the other hand, stands out from his ex-NFL peers in one significant way: Unlike 90 percent of the players surveyed who said they would make the same choice to play professional football again, King said he absolutely would not.
"My whole life, from the time I first picked up a football, that's all I wanted to do. And then I got drafted and I go, 'Oh, man, I got drafted... Life is going just fine,'" he said. "I was in the NFL, and that's all that mattered. But now I wish I'd never heard of it."